Being appreciated

I think that people will just about do anything for others if they feel appreciated.

I had a former Pastor tell me once that he did not compliment or express appreciation to his staff or volunteers very much because if he did it would cheapen it when he did finally express something. The reality is though that people generally don’t hear appreciation anywhere as much as they hear ¬†criticism. What I mean is that in practice I think when a leader expressed gratitude, appreciation it is not heard anywhere as much as what the leader thinks it is.

I was talking to another Pastor and he was telling me what a good ministry a staff member was doing. However I knew how the staff member felt. They did not feel the Senior had ever really expressed appreciation or gratitude. In fact they described in detail how the Pastor continually made them feel unappreciated and unsupported.

Now there needs to be a balance. Some staff members are insecure, cannot take critique and need to be handled gently. That can be really painful in a leadership position. Reality is in a church context there needs to be robust feedback. And this need not be taken personally. We all want to be better.

People will generally rise to greater heights when you express belief in them. They may not even feel that they are qualified or able to achieve results. But your belief in them as their leader will mean they will aspire to be who you see them as.

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